The Kiffness releases “Celibate Healing” and gets candid with his own sexual urges

Y’all know how I feel about The Kiffness.

In this age of general online outrage, where we so desperately need to try to learn to laugh at ourselves again, The Kiffness (Dave Scott) has somewhat perfected this art while on his journey of becoming “the new Flight of the Conchords.”

His latest video for “Celibate Healing” started as an idea to create a very sexy-sounding R&B song and to flip the narrative of the usual “guy singing about how bad he wants a girl” and rather make it about how not keen he is. Brilliant.

Our favourites over at Dolph are responsible for the creation of “Camp Celibate”, where Scott has seemingly tried to isolate himself from society and the sexual temptations that come with it.

That is, until he sees a bear with a nice ass and well, he’s really not strong enough to resist any kind of temptation.

“Although it’s a funny concept, it’s not actually far off from what I went through in my early 20s at Rhodes. Throughout high school and varsity I was a devote Christian and still am, but with a slightly different outlook,” Scott explains to me.

He goes on to chat about how he was literally saving himself for marriage (ala The Jonas Brothers) but that he was constantly struggling with very natural day-to-day sexual urges.

“I had one foot in the church, and another foot in drinking, partying & hooking up with random girls and that constant limbo between the two took quite a severe toll on my psyche,” he confesses.

“This was all very well and good and I’m grateful for that time, but on the same token I found that isolating myself from that world almost made my sex drive more twisted and obscure. I could go weeks without feeling lust for someone or something, but then all it would take was a glance at a girl on the cover of a magazine to send my mind spiralling down into places I never wanted it to,” he says.

Scott wrote about the objectification of women and the reasons why he stopped watching porn, circa 2016, and I remember the reaction to his initial post wasn’t entirely positive although I’m not altogether sure why.

If the guy stopped watching porn because he wanted to better his life, who the hell is anyone to criticise? But moving along.

I’m all for the message that Scott is trying to convey here. When it boils down to it, he saying that it’s ok to try and be “better” but there’s a point at which suppressing your sexual urges is only doing yourself, and potentially others, more harm.

Think about that long and hard this lurvely Valentine’s Day, kids.